Frensm is as frensm does

Whatever the hell that means.

Anyway, I'll tell you a story. A little earlier I went to pay my respects to the Comedy Goddess, in order to make a small jocular remark about Glogg, a Swedish punch which she is currently promoting. Whenever I wish to comment upon CG's blog, I am required to copy a group of apparently random letters, termed 'word verification', before I can post my ramblings. Now, generally speaking, the letters make very little sense, and do not, as a rule, spell out anything that can be found in the OED. But today, another of CG's visitors, Ann (of Ann's Rants) found herself being asked to input the word unpubast, which she thought sounded like the technical term for a bikini waxer.

This, of course, got me thinking. Could we create a whole new dictionary, based solely upon the apparently random output of the word verification gnomes? By Jove, I think we could. The following have all been generated from CG's post a comment box, just this afternoon, and the definitions were the first things that came into my head. Well, almost:

Bakerni - A Croatian oath, similar to the English cry of ‘knackers’.

Scrimpor - Cartoon super-villain, whose special power is an ability to spend very little money.

Ating - The act of stranding someone on a small island in the middle of the River Thames.

Sherrea - A little-known law from a tiny religious sect that insists upon all its adherents drinking fortified wine.

Frensm - An East Anglian dialect word, incorporating friendly and handsome (in the sense of ‘generous’) - eg That’s right frensm of ‘ee! Generally used to thank someone for purchasing a drink.

Coothe - Common name for the North American Lisping Pigeon

Siffist - Someone who shuns the Seattle International Film Festival (there is such a thing, I swear!)

Inegur - An authentic-sounding Icelandic name, generally used with a following adjective (eg Inegur the Strong, Inegur the Skull-splitter, etc.)

Corturts - (i) the pain experienced when injected into an elbow joint with cortisone; or (ii) the actual words uttered by the unfortunate individual in receipt of the injection.

Extusice - The act of expelling a member of a fitness club from the membership list.

Gatiomen - An unusual Japanese noodle dish, made piquant by the addition of a small amount of kitten meat.

Eazed - The sense of relief afforded by the application of a soothing rub or cream.

Grallin - An ocean fish, noted for its passing resemblance to Sarah Palin, former vice-presidential hopeful.

Over to you. I'm hoping this even-lighter-weight-than-usual posting will buy me some time until I have something really useful to say.